I'm in the mood for B, B, B words!
Balance and boundaries, baby!
Huge themes in my life. A big part of balance for me is moderation & it includes boundaries. They wrap around each other, twisting and turning. Presenting me with challenges everywhere I turn.
I have a hard time putting the breaks on and shifting gears...if I'm doing a project at work and it's time to do something else...say like eat lunch or use the restroom...I have a hard time pulling myself away from what I'm doing. This can cause all sorts of problems, like being late or even giving myself a bladder infection.
Then there is the concept of boundaries, that took me a long time to even grasp the concept of...I think the only ones that I've had consistently understood from a really young age on is that you close and lock the bathroom door when you are using the toilet and bathing and also you close the door when you change change your clothes. That's about it.
So when you put these two items together...a person with few boundaries and who has a hard time changing gears it results in situations that have been huge learning experiences. I'm sure I'm not alone on this.
Learning that I need to put down task A to do something for myself can be challenging, especially when it begins to impact my health or relationships...speaking of relationships that takes me right into boundaries which had created problems for me in learning to say " No" and where to draw the line...like hanging up the phone when someone gets verbally abusive and learning to cut the cords without...yikes that old companion of mine called guilt...in all sorts of unhealthy relationships.
While I may not have understood much about boundaries, that in no way means that I was a follower. I tend to find myself in many situations where I'm the leader, but a leader without boundaries who has a difficult time with balance can soon find she takes on a lot of work in many areas of life. It's much easier now that I've established boundaries.
Awareness is very key too. Being mindful and aware, being conscious of the moment. These are invaluable tools. Just the fact that I know that I tend to have a difficult time stopping & then noticing when I'm in a situation where I'm doing that thrills me beyond belief & makes me feel free! It may sounds crazy, but just suddenly becoming aware of the fact that I've been working on something for hours and I'm hungry so I should stop and eat feels amazing! Just today I'd feel myself getting all caught up in a project I was working on at work and every once in a while I'd notice my shoulders were getting tight or my chest was getting a bit constricted and I'd hear a little voice saying "it's good to stretch and concentrate on breathing right now and go ahead and rub that knot forming in my shoulder", then I did & guess what...I felt a bit more balanced! I paid attention to my body & still had a super productive day.
Likewise, I received several questions relating to items that I am no longer responsible for at work. Before I was really aware of establishing boundaries, I would have jumped in and assist in doing the research to assist my co-workers even if I stayed up until mid-night, ignoring my needs which include family and personal time. Instead, I've learned to still be helpful, while directing them to someone else or some other helpful source. This is an example of how establishing boundaries helps achieve more balance.
Being aware of what I need and want & finding tools the right tools to help establish balance and boundaries is exhilerating and liberating!!!
Thank you Angels for helping me to achieve balance in my life by doing things in moderation and listening to my body and your promptings for when it's time to stop one thing to do another, even relax. I am grateful for learning that having boundaries is so beneficial to me. And so it is.